Sunday, September 20, 2009

Apple picking

I love peaceful Sunday mornings. The sun is shining bright through the blinds of my bedroom window pushing me out of my coccoon where I'm all wrapped up listening to the crows make a ruckus through the open window. The air is really cool and starting to get crisp in the mornings; a good sign autumn is on its way.

Today the family will be apple picking - a perfect day for it! Dad's band will play and my nieces and nephews will dance around in front of the stage. I really appreciate these times and try to capture every smile and every experience they encounter along the way. JH is coming with us subjecting himself to all the craziness. LOL This amazing person came into my life only 9 days ago, but strangely enough, it feels like we've been together for a few months at least. I feel like a teenager all over again lost in all my feelings and the butterflies in my stomach when he calls or sends me a text message. I love how all those favorite songs make even more sense or take on a whole new meaning specific to someone new. Still, in all the excitement there is a level of maturity in this connection that I haven't felt before but that is refreshing, comforting and welcomed. I've always believed that I wouldn't find "that person" until I was in my 40's because of so much of my own soul searching, figuring out what I wanted out of life and what defined me as a woman. I think it is true that you don't really know yourself until these years. You look back at life, your experiences, your mistakes, your achievements, your passions and, like a short film, you can see who you are and how you got here and everything that molded you into the person you currently are; you know what you want, what you will accept and what you won't. It's a wild ride but a very necessary one. Yet, in all the preparedness of the years spent getting to this place, I can't help but feel unprepared, blindsided, stepping on certain rocks on the beach that will keep me from falling into the water. Fate, destiny, a higher power or just plain coincidence brought us here. Where we go from here, no one knows. I will take one day at a time, savor each moment, and treasure each memory and know that even if it doesn't go the distance, the ride was so worth it. xo

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